And suddenly the craziest idea that ever crossed my mind… 7 days of backpacking to the middle of nowhere.

Oh God… if this doesn’t according to Your Blueprint of my life, you surely will never allow such a crazy idea to cross my mind, right?

Dizzy…excitement…rush of adrenaline.

But…do I have the courage…?

Do I have what it takes to start this?

Ahhhhh…  I think I’m going crazy.

Aiyooo…otoke…!? Otoke, Mr.J? Should I go…shouldn’t I go?

“As we grow older, it’s not the things we did that we often regret

but the things we didn’t do.“

Another thing that crossed my mind…. I absolutely….don’t want to regret of the things I didn’t do.

Hey, Mr.J…. I’ll be counting on You more then. Love U, J.

my unspoken words…

What happen to that passionate lady I once knew? 

Don’t get me wrong. I do happy for the new chapter in your life. I sincerely am.

But why? Why do I feel like your world suddenly stop spinning?

What happen to that girl who is dreaming touring around the world?

Why do you have to stop dreaming? 

What happen to that girl, an enthusiast girl who wants to study this and that?

Where is she?

Why do I feel like you’re making all those reasons to stop you on the track?

You said you have no time because of your children.

I said, because of your children, shouldn’t you be more courageous and be more passionate about your dreams, about your life.

Shouldn’t you show them how wonderful the life that their mother has?

That to have a dream, and courageously run after your dream is precious.

That to study this and that, and to study more and more is life’s award.

Shouldn’t you share your passion towards life with your children?

It’s your inheritance for them, isn’t it?

Compare to money, houses, cars, isn’t it more precious?

To encourage your children to have dreams, study lots of things, be more passionate, and to love life.

But in the end, I can only be still.

Just know this, no matter what happen, you are my friend.

*Sigh…

2. Eat ddokbooki (spicy rice cakes on a stall on the street)

3. Taste soju (Won 1000 per bottle, just one, make sure you don’t get drunk, and you drink it with your girlfriends)

4. Taste makgeolli (Rice wine, drink it with the special makgeolli glass)

5. Go to Jejudooooo…perhaps snorkeling if it’s possible

6. Go to Seo Byun’s garden apartment.

7. Go to at least one of this shows (MusicBank, MusicCore or Inkigayo)

8. Taking a picture on Coffee Prince’s cafe down the MBC station

9. Don’t forget hanbok…one silk hanbok to go please…

10. Buy a lotere…..lol

11. Since it’s winter…perhaps, ice skating (optional)

12. Visit the Goong (Gyeongbok Palace)

13. Don’t forget make an appointment and meet with Aarti Swain

14. Go to at least one musical in the theatre

15. Dohhh…Namsan Tower is a must! And also Namsan Cable Car..

16. Go to at least one museum.

17. Lotte World..(optional)

18. Namdaemun market…(hunting for a cap, tasting mandoo guk-dumpling soup and bindae duk-skillet-fried mung-bean pancake)

19. A sweater and a jacket @ itaewon.

20. An evening stroll down the Cheonggyecheon Stream

21. Register for Seoul Tour City Bus

22. HongDae……enjoy the indie music..yeah

23. Go to Pamunjom, the coupd’etat village between North Korea n South Korea. Take a picture with North Korea’s soldier…lol

24. Traditional Tea House, Yet Cha Jip, @ Insa-dong District

25. The cool fountain in front of City Hall Square (don’t forget to bring change clothes and towel)

26. How can I forget…..Spa and the 24 hours sauna, also the public bath house…lol

27. Perhaps get a temporary perm..like an ahjumma (definitely an optional)

Ps: Must remember to take a picture as evidence.

Planned Days : 9 Days

Planned Budget : 3000 SGD (2.6 million krw)

Target reached so far : 33%

Transportation Cost (SG-Seoul) : 1000 SGD.

Transportation Cost (Seoul-Jeju Do) : 300 SGD

Accomodation Cost (7 Days in Seoul) : 140,000 krw (7*20,000 krw @http://www.guesthouseinkorea.com)

Accomodation Cost (3 Days, 2 Nights in Jejudo) : 100 SGD (2*50 SGD @http://www.hostelworld.com)

Things that I must bring :

- Bible and my ODB

- 1 big towel, 1 small towel, handkerchieves

- 1 bed sheet, 1 pillow case, 1 bolster case

- 1 sarong, or small blanket

- thick jackets, scarf, socks, gloves, undies

- my minihp, and it’s adaptor

- my digicam, empty the memory, 2 pack of batteries, charger

- my polaroid and lots…lots of film packages

- 3 jeans, 1 skirt, 12 tshirts/shirts

- 1 flat boots, 1 sandal, 1 skeechers

- 1 bottle drink, medium size

- 2 tupperwares, mediumand large size

- Liquid soap, shampoo, conditioner, lotion, moisturizer, lip gloss (all in small size)

Motto..motto : Love budgets, Saving comes first than spending, No expensive coffees on working days, No luxury dining on working days, Save…save…save..so you can travel the world. Amen.

When people said, “I doubt your skill!”

Then, it is the time, when I have to grit my teeth, cover my ears, and move forward.

I may get punched once or twice, I may bleeding, I may get hurt in the process, but I won’t back down.

Once I fall, I’ll get up. Twice I fall, still I’ll get up. Even if I fall for the millionth time, I will get up using my own two feet.

For I know, this is my battle. And no one is the victor, unless me.

And by the time, I finish this battle, I may face another battle, greater, harder, and deadlier battle.

Should I continue or should I bravely heed to the battlefield? Well, quitting is no longer an option.

Since a great warrior didn’t born in the easy war, they were born in the deadliest battle, armed with determination, and crowned with victory.

This is how far I’ve come, and must I go a thousand miles.

The journey isn’t over yet. As a matter of fact, it has only just begun.

Hoping and praying that you both are okay, and keep healthy as always.

Mom…

Dad…

For the past times when I was a little baby, how you both took care of me, I feel so grateful.

For the past times when I was a little girl, how you both taught me how to write and to read. And you, Dad, for giving the most honorable place, your lap, to this little girl. I am so thankful.

For the past times during my teenage years, how you both put up with my rebellion and hurtful words that came out of my mouth, but still, during the worst time in my life, you both were there and never turned your back on me, I, this wrench daughter of yours, sincerely want to say thank you.

During my second year in senior high school, how you cried, my Mom cried, because I got rank 17th, the lowest rank ever in my academic year. I did remember that I got mad at you, when the truth was I also felt so disappointed with myself, and wanted to say sorry to you, but I just had no courage to say it.

For the times when I was in college, and you both gave up your pleasure and put priority to my needs. Thank you for that.

And Mom, remember that afternoon, when you told me that you changed your mind about continuing your study and get bachelor degree, because you think about me and my brother and my sister. Because you think better use the money for our education. Remember that afternoon, Mom? Perhaps, you don’t remember. But I do, I do remember.

And Dad, remember that night, when you told us how hard it was for you to go to school. That even your own parents couldn’t afford your high school tuition money, and you must worked after school in a local market, so you would have money for your school fees. How hard it must be for you, right? And how you never let us to experience such hardships in our life, from kindergarten to college. Because you know how hard that kind of life, that’s why you worked so hard so we’ll live comfortable. My dad, my great and hard working dad.

I did remember your words for me when you were giving me Ayam na Ni Atur. That I must:

- Live my life orderly

- To be humble and don’t be arrogant

- To respect and appreciate everyone

I do remember that, and I live day by day following that words of yours.

And next year, next year… just watch me, Mom, Dad.

When I start my master programme…

Again, I will make you both proud of me.

Watch me, Mom, Dad.

Watch how I will, step by step, getting closer to that goal.

And you both will widely smile. That you both will proudly say to others, “That….”, point your finger at me, “That is our daughter.”

And Jesus too, proudly He will said,

“That she is, my bride…”

Today, I declare that I am mad in love with you…lol.

Dang, I even got watery eyes because of you…lol.

Hiks…hiks…

Ha…Ha…Ha…

Dang…I love my job

You don’t share any of your darc choc, Lady…

Ever…

not even with my sister…

not even with my brother…

…

…

…

Well, perhaps with my parents…

…

…

oh… and with…

…

…

the most gorgeous groom in the world.

(*^_^*)

It means freedom.

Tight shirt, short skirt means fine.

Old jeans + worn out shirt, that’s ok.

Short skirt + biggest size of t-shirt, even better.

High heels, flat boots, sandals or even sneakers when you go out, it’s all up to me, babe.

But does it mean heavy make up? Nope, compact powder + lipgloss should be fine. Heck no….being a woman does not defined by whether you are wearing a make up or not.

It’s not even defined by whether you have a man or not.

You don’t define your happiness by what you have or what you don’t have, by what you are wearing or not you are wearing, by what your education title, by with whom you are friends with, not even defined by who your parents/brothers/sisters are.

You are who you are, and that’s enough.

Hanging out with my girlfriends on Saturday night, why not? Kinda missing my-girls-nite-out with my sista though. The funniest thing is, all of us are singles. Even some of them are older than me. We can laugh and joke to our hearts content. Eating to our hearts content too at a favorite buffet. The point is, we’re having fun, enjoying ourselves as who we are. Undefined by whether you have “tails” or not, whether you have six digits salary or not, whether you have engagement/wedding ring or not.

Why is it that fun?

First, before I am going to be someone’s friend/girlfriend/fiancee/wife, I am a human being.

Second, after being a human being, I am a woman.

Third, I don’t have any ‘unofficial-obligation’ explaining to someone why I don’t want to spend my precious Saturday nite with that person.

Fourth, I can go out wear anything I like, I don’t need to be worry about what I am going to wear.

Fifth, I don’t have any obligation answering an unexpected phone call from someone wondering where I am now. Hell, pai tuo ni la….puhhleaseee. You know, it’s like you put a mentally chain around my neck. Stop being 2nd Hitler.

Sixth, I am are free to do anything on my own. Things that are still within my boundaries and principles, say no for alcohol + cigarettes. Real woman take care their body well.

Seventh, I dont’ even acknowledged that person as my “something”.

Seriously, at time like this, where women have ability to empower themselves, you are still trapped in some kind of hallucination world that you control every step, every words, every acts of your woman. Why don’t you ask Barbie to be your woman? Talk to my hand. Want to know why spending my precious time with you is not appealing to me? Well, because even working sounds more enchanting than that.

This is what a woman wants…
Any man of mine better be proud of me
Even when I’m ugly he still better love me
And I can be late for a date that’s fine
But he better be on time

Any man of mine’ll say it fits just right
When last year’s dress is just a little too tight
And anything I do or say better be okay
When I have a bad hair day

And if I change my mind
A million times
I wanna hear him say
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah I like it that way

Any man of mine better walk the line
Better show me a teasin’ squeezin’ pleasin’ kinda time
I need a man who knows, how the story goes
He’s gotta be a heartbeatin’ fine treatin’
Breathtakin’ earthquakin’ kind
Any man of mine

Well any man of mine better disagree
When I say another woman’s lookin’ better than me
And when I cook him dinner and I burn it black
He better say, mmmm, I like it like that yeah

And if I changed my mind
A million times
I wanna hear him say
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah I like it that way

Any man of mine better walk the line
Better show me a teasin’ squeezin’ pleasin’ kinda time
I need a man who knows, how the story goes
He’s gotta be a heartbeatin’ fine treatin’
Breathtakin’ earthquakin’ kind
Any man of mine

Let me hear you say yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah I like it that way

Any man of mine better walk the line
Better show me a teasin’ squeezin’ pleasin’ kinda time
I need a man who knows, how the story goes
He’s gotta be a heartbeatin’ fine treatin’
Breathtakin’ earthquakin’ kind
Any man of mine

You gotta shimmy shake
Make the earth quake
Kick, turn, stomp, stomp, then you jump
Heel to toe, Do Si Do
‘Til your boots wanna break
“Til your feet and your back ache
Keep it movin’ ’til you just can’t take anymore
Come on everybody on the floor
A-one two, a-three four
Hup two, hum
If you wanna be a man of mine, that’s right
This is what a woman wants…

And I don’t accept less than that

Quoted from Han Jeong Won @ Twinkle-Twinkle: “Omma, Can I just skip the marriage and have children directly?” LOL……..you get my vote for that JeongWon…Lup you, girl.

In waiting mode for the purple rose.

Mei : hahaha…simple thing sist, for everything, there are two sides of everything, the joy and the hurt, the good and the bad, the right and the wrong. Because if there is no hurt, how come you know what the joy is, if there is no good, you will never know what the bad is, and if there is no wrong, how come you know what the right thing to do.

Like a coin, there are two sides of it.
Like our brother said, “minimal musti 2 arah” (in order to view everything).
Like you once said, “Kenapa kita tahu Lala itu baik, karena ada BomBom yang kelakuannya selalu jahat?” (taken from sinetron Bidadari…lol)

And then a question pops in my head, Why? Why we need two sides of everything, and the answer pops the next second, because the two sides will create the balance. Next thought in my head, “balance”, just like my sign, right, the libra, hahaha.

Next thought…
Now, the problem is, which side do you prefer? Of course everyone choose the good side, the fun side, but remember too much of a good thing is not a good thing, hahaha….

So in the end, whether love brings you hurt or happiness, embrace those feelings and be grateful for that, including the hurt, yeap, including the hurt.

hehehe

Cie : why your words so inspiring lately, sist? Yes, sometimes I just focus on bad things and forget about all the good things, yeah… As you know me so well, I think I need to brainstorming about many things with you, dear!

Mei : *lately….hmmm…

I think I always “enlighten” you…hahaha….
It’s just that we haven’t talked like we usually did in “ages”….
hehehe…

It’s just that entering the year 2011, I feel so blessed and content, learning to count what I already have instead of what I don’t have, learning to be grateful with any kind of experiences that I got for the 25 years of my life, the good, the bad and the worst. And somehow, I found out, it’s in the worst times that I “sharpen my knife” and become a better me, and along that road, so many people I met, I helped and helped me in return, whether they came as friends, families, or rivalries.

And even if a genie appear in front of me and offer me to change one single event in my life, gladly I can answer that there is no, not even a single event in my life that I want to change. hehehe.

Sigh, indeed it feels like ages we don’t talk like we used to do.

Cie : Sist, reading your message looked like I’m talking to you directly, somehow made me sad and miss you more than before.. Yeah, I miss those moments. Talking and talking and talking our own experiences all day long over midnight. Sometimes I talked and you’re sleeping. Sometimes you shared then I’m snoring.. I love you, my only sister and the best one! :’)

****

“She is your mirror, shining back at you with a world of possibilities. She is your witness, who sees you at your worst and best, and loves you anyway. She is your partner in crime, your midnight companion, someone who knows when you are smiling, even in the dark. She is your teacher, your defense attorney, your personal press agent. She is your sister.”

“This life is what you make it. Not matter what, you’re going to mess up sometimes, it’s a universal truth. But the good part is you get to decide how you’re going to mess it up. Girls will be your friends – they’ll act like it anyway. But just remember, some come, some go. The ones that stay with you through everything – they’re your true best friends. Don’t let go of them. Also remember, sisters make the best friends in the world. As for lovers, well, they’ll come and go too. And babe, I hate to say it, most of them – actually pretty much all of them are going to break your heart, but you can’t give up because if you give up, you’ll never find your soul mate. You’ll never find that half who makes you whole and that goes for everything. Just because you fail once, doesn’t mean you’re gonna fail at everything. Keep trying, hold on, and always, always, always believe in yourself, because if you don’t, then who will, sweetie? So keep your head high, keep your chin up, and most importantly, keep smiling, because life’s a beautiful thing and there’s so much to smile about.” – Marilyn Monroe